Saturday, April 30, 2011

Fear

At the beginning of an unwelcome journey.  I wonder where it will lead.  I'm scared.  I've been thinking and rethinking that to myself, but never said or written it out loud till now.  Admitting it out loud helps to ease the fear a bit, in the sharing.

Fear wakes me up in the early hours with random thoughts of worry-ful things.  I feel my chest tighten.  I've been face to face with death, watching as he took the life of my aunt as she prepared for a testing procedure while in the hospital.  Long suppressed images of that day play over and over in my head only this time with a different loved one.

I feel pain at leaving my family in one state to be with family in another.
Trying to remember Ps. 46:10
"Be still and know that I am God."

2 comments:

  1. (((Linda)))

    Helplessness is scary.

    This life tests us to our limits. Not so that God will know what we are made of; He already does. Life tests us so that we will know. That is the beginning of wisdom. If it helps, remember that fear is just that - fear. And pain is just pain. While you wait for them to pass, know that you are not in it alone. You are surrounded by a great crowd of witnesses and friends, not only in Heaven, but here. Don't be afraid to reach out and to take the help you need. That is what we are here for. And know that you are loved. Kitty vibes.

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  2. Oh remember, remember... trust.... and what Pam said

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